Who are you? We are Merchandise. Brad B. Wood on guitars and vocals, and Conrad Astley on keyboards.

How did you get together? The pair of us bumped into each other on a drunken night at university, decided to form a band and we’ve been tinkering around ever since.

The story so far… Bit of an odd one, really. While most bands spend years on the live circuit before setting foot in a studio, we’ve done it all the other way around. Merchandise has existed as a recording duo for ages using a lot of lyrics by Roger Williams. We released a couple of albums, including last year’s Lo-Tech Solutions To Hi-Tech Problems, through Brad’s Cityscape Records label. That got a great response and ended up being distributed through Universal, but we were adamant our sound was too complicated to work on stage. Some time last year, we were finally talked into doing it live, got drummer Rob Turner on board, and played our first ever gig at a mate’s leaving do with The Loungs last week - about a decade after deciding to form a band. You could say we’re a bit like a fine wine, if you were really pretentious, which we obviously are . . .

What do you sound like? People who reviewed the last album came out with everything from Belle and Sebastian to Frank Sinatra, bizarrely, and all sorts of stuff in between. We might as well get the plug in early - your best bet is to come to the gig and find out. The live sound has ended up being a lot heavier than the recorded version.

What’s on your record player? We’re both into a massive range of music, which is probably why our stuff can’t easily be pinned down. We’re both big Belle and Sebastian fans, and we’re also into US punk band Fugazi - we’re named after one of their songs - although you wouldn’t guess it by listened to us. Recently we’ve been listening to The Arcade Fire, The National, Death Cab for Cutie, The Super Furry Animals and Sufjan Stevens.

If you could play with one band, who would it be and why? Either The Fall or The Houghton Weavers. Too complicated to explain why.

What’s been the highlight so far? Getting some brilliant reviews for the last album, finding people in faraway places like Hungary, Australia, and Canada had picked up on it, and getting national airplay was all rather nice.

And the most embarrassing moment? As we’re just starting out live, we’ve not had any yet, but I’m sure there’s plenty in the pipeline. Brad was previously in a band called Mazeppa who had far too many to mention.

What’s your definition of success? Sitting in a yacht in Monte Carlo sipping champagne would be alright… but we’d settle for us all living in a big bus.

What have you got lined up for the future? Another opportunity for a plug - fantastic! We’ve got more gigs coming up, at No 15 on January 28, and The Life Café in Manchester on February 9. We’ve also got some gigs in Lancaster and Liverpool, and at some point we’ll have to find time to finish our next album which we’re half way through. Scarily enough, it’ll be number three.

How long before you can quit the day jobs? It depends how much you’re paying for this interview - That’ll remain a pipedream unless something fairly astronomical happens. We’ve both been messing around with this long enough to realise you don’t make cash out of it unless you’re Richard Branson.

If I was your fairy godmother and could grant you one wish, what would it be?
To be Richard Branson.

NOT many bands can attract the sort of glowing praise lavished on Merchandise without having ever played a single note in front of a live audience.

Despite receiving an embarrassment of adoring reviews and getting airplay in Europe, North America and Australia, the band has not so much as plugged a microphone into a PA system.

Instead, they spent years locking themselves away from the world in their home studio, toiling away over lovingly-crafted albums and shunning the world of the live gig.

But now, after getting sick of fans asking them when they would take the show on the road, the duo have had a change of heart, and decided to embrace that grubby, sweaty world in all its glory.

Hooking up with long-standing collaborator Rob Turner, they have set about turning their complicated studio sound into something that could be played by three human beings, with no gimmickry, gadgetry or slights of hand.

The distillation process now complete, the band have translated their sound to the stage, and are ready to share it with the world.

The results may be surprising . . .

NOT many bands can attract the sort of glowing praise lavished on Merchandise without having ever played a single note in front of a live audience.

Despite receiving an embarrassment of adoring reviews and getting airplay in Europe, North America and Australia, the band has not so much as plugged a microphone into a PA system.

Instead, they spent years locking themselves away from the world in their home studio, toiling away over lovingly-crafted albums and shunning the world of the live gig.

But now, after getting sick of fans asking them when they would take the show on the road, the duo have had a change of heart, and decided to embrace that grubby, sweaty world in all its glory.

Hooking up with long-standing collaborator Rob Turner, they have set about turning their complicated studio sound into something that could be played by three human beings, with no gimmickry, gadgetry or slights of hand.

The distillation process now complete, the band have translated their sound to the stage, and are ready to share it with the world.

The results may be surprising …